I have always been afraid of my past because I have liked nothing about it, however I like my present. I like the way I have grown and come so far. I like the way I think and how mature I’ve gotten. It feels really good and it makes me really happy but whenever I meet anyone new in order to understand who I am today I have to go back to my past and dig up the dead.
All those who have had a really rocky past would feel the same way I feel about resurrecting the buried and what makes it worse is repeating the mistakes you’ve made before.
BUT, the past is nothing to fear; it’s just a mirror to look back on.
It’s about those lessons, those failures and the pain you went through to get where you are today. While happiness comes to everybody someday in their lives, it’s because they have understood what sadness means to them. For some it takes longer to reach the point of feeling good while for others it’s a shorter route but whatever it is you should be proud of what you are today!
You were younger, sillier and immature and now you are older, smarter and so much more mature than before. If your past has been something that you have hated and would never want to repeat you should also be able to track the mistakes you have committed before and stop them from arising again because the only way we recollect our past without our conscious permission is if we are reliving the pain we’ve gotten out of not so long ago.
Don’t do the things that have hurt you before, strengthen your mind, stop the triggers and let yourself know that, that is NOT YOU, that is just somebody YOU WERE. Let yourself get to know the new you, remind yourself about how you manage your pain and issues in the present. Habits are very hard to kill but they die when you replace them with newer ones!
So don’t be afraid when you fall back to an older version of yourself, just be cautious and stay afloat in your newer version of yourself, after all you are doing it for your happiness and for you!
Don’t hurt yourself again and again if you know what you’re doing wrong no matter how tempting it might feel to fix things when they break. You might end up spoiling things even more unknowingly. Breathe and take a new approach and put your needs first and you will be okay! Take an example of your past and believe like you’re looking into a mirror and pick out the flaws to make yourself perfect and you won’t be afraid of looking into the mirror ever again.
Until the next blog!